Hour of Power

I swear, sometimes I only workout because I know that at the end of the day I'll have something to write about. I dread a blank screen more than I dread a painful training session and so I give myself a minute to decide what sort of workout is best and then I just do it. I wonder if that's the best thing that comes of writing this blog. But if so, then this blog is successful indeed. They call that something, don't they? Doing something not of your own accord but for somebody or something else. They do - they call it accountability.

Who or what are you accountable to? We all have things we could do better. If you're a Type 1.5 diabetic like me, maybe your A1C lives near the 8% mark and you want to get it lower. Maybe you're a type 2 and your goal is weight loss. Or you've taken on the Gluten Free Challenge and find yourself faltering, standing in the aisles at the grocery store with a hand on a box of mac and cheese, or in line at a sandwich shop. Maybe you're training for a competition, or just working towards your own personal goal. Are you a creative type who keeps resolving to start that novel, or finish that screenplay?

Everywhere I look I see people with wonderful wonderful goals. One friend wants to learn Portuguese so he can go to Brazil for the world cup. Another wants to save enough money to buy a house. One has aspirations to be a great banjo player. But goals are cheap. They are. It's a beautiful word that belongs somewhere near maybe or could in the dictionary.

I wrote a bit about willpower yesterday. But today I want you to think about what role accountability can play in fortifying your willpower. And when you're done thinking about it, choose one of your goals (preferably one that is attainable in the near-term, say a month or two) and find a way to hold yourself accountable. Make a pledge to someone who will check in on you and monitor your progress.

So what's an hour of power anyway?

Well, it's a very unoriginal name for sitting on an ergometer...

...and pulling you're butt off...

...for an hour.

It hurts. It's long. It's boring. BUT...




When you finish you realize you've just rowed 9.5 miles, a solid hour, burned over 1000 calories and you know that you are stronger and healthier than you were before. And what's more, you've built your self-confidence and strengthened your resolve. Next time will be easier and easier still until you'll have to make the workout harder to keep up with your progress.

But for those of you who read this only for the fitness aspect, yes, I realize that I've done two epic cardio workouts in one week. I had to do it to prove to myself that I could. It was mental training. Did I have what it would take to push through a distance. I answered that question. My question for next week is, how much intense pain can I suffer in the short term. In other words, sprints, and things like sprints, and lots of them.

Dailies:

12:17 -> 120 Seems a peculiar number. had 2 Prandin w/cereal 110c. Rowed a POWER HOUR! Had an orange 16c and salad w/quinoa 45c and chicken.
5:37 -> 77 Took a Prandin with chicken, quinoa 40c, indian eggplant 26c, orange 16c. Did Joey. At 9:30 had pb toast 15c, protein shake 5c and fake coffee 8c. At 10:45 had a shot of tequila, beer and Larabar 26c. Took 5 units Lantus at 1:50
2:40 -> 74 Don't feel like taking meds and waiting, so I just had baby zucchini 12c w/ tahini 5c.

Day 65

The Gluten Free Challenge

It was in Turkey back in September of 2009 that I really understood for the first time the purpose of giving something up for Lent. It does not feel so long ago that I was there, wandering the stalls of the Istanbul spice market, feasting on river fish, fresh figs, walnuts crushed with honey and cheese, sipping their dark and syrupy tea in a glass delicately held between my two fingers. A few days later I was on my own in the small seaside town of Amasrat, where I could sprawl on great sun baked rocks and watch the locals exchange village gossip or sit themselves in the shade of the cliffs. But it wasn't until I went to Bolu, a large but unimportant town in central Turkey that the meaning became clear.

Let me start by explaining that there is nothing in Bolu. It is a very dull place unless you are being hosted, which I suppose I was. He met me at the local park, spotting me easily, a tall blonde man made whiter by the goopy thick sunscreen I bought from the nearest convenient store. I've since forgotten his name but he was a slight man, short, dressed in a short sleeved collard button up one size to big tucked into his khaki shorts which were cinched tightly in an effort to give him the waist his God overlooked. When we met he was tired and irritable, nursing a headache and fatigue, but he put his physical troubles aside and took me to a local favorite spot of his for some food. I ordered two sandwiches and some exotic pastries before it dawned on me that he was a very religious man.

September of 2009 was Ramadan, a time of year when Muslims eat only when the sun is down. If you're thinking, "hey, I could just become nocturnal for the month" then you're just where I was two years ago. But even if you did choose to spend your Ramadan sleeping during the day and dining in the dark, which wouldn't be so fun after a few days, you'd be missing the point. As it was explained to me by my Turkish host, the point is to experience life, if only while the sun is up, as the poor and hungry do. He had been fasting since 5am, no food, no water and it was nearly sun down and still in the mid 80s. To feel, actually feel the hunger and the thirst is to understand better their lives. There is no better foundation for compassion than this shared experience.

That night when the sun finally went down he met with friends around a table sagging under the weight of the food. It was a buffet set for kings and as they filled themselves with all the bounty of the very generous Turkish land I saw them come to life again, enjoying food as you never can when it's always there. They had gained an appreciation for the gift of nourishment.

It's not Ramadan, and I'm not Muslim. But tomorrow is Ash Wednesday which means the beginning of Lent. I don't think I've successfully given something up for Lent in years, or even decades. Partially this was due to laziness (I couldn't think of anything big enough not to feel guilty but small enough not to really change my day to day life), partially this was due to a lack of motivation. I asked myself, "what's the point? Why should I give up chocolate... beer... ice cream? What will that teach me?" But those questions are selfish.

And so I come to my challenge for you.



I challenge you, the readers of this blog to learn what it is to be afflicted by gluten free living, to walk for a month in the footsteps of Celiacs and others with dietary restrictions around the world. Feel the small burden of our daily restrictions and sacrifices and know that no matter how annoying it may get, some day your inconvenience will end, but ours is for life.

I welcome you to share your experiences as comments on this post. What was the hardest thing to give up? What did you crave the most? What new foods did you learn to love? How did you find eating at restaurants? Would you be able to make the switch if you had to? I hope we all grow from the experience.

Dailies:

10:33 -> 116 Higher than I've been in the morning, I blame my late night. Took 2 Prandin w/Breakfast: Cereal 110c, banana 25c. At 1:00 had an orange 20c.
3:10 -> 108 Took 1 Prandin with Lunch: 1/2 rotisserie chicken, plantains 70c, salad 5c. At 5:00 had 1/4 protein bar 6c, peanuts 6c, 1/2 orange 10c and teeccino 7c. At 8:30 had peanuts 7c and 1/2 orange 10c.
10:48 -> 79 Took 2 Prandin with Dinner: Salad w/quinoa 60c, asparagus with onions 30c, bagel 26c, banana 26c, peanut butter 8c = 150c.
1:54 -> 256 Felt high, was high. The bagel was too much which is too bad. It was really really delicious. I'm sure I'll drop into range by tomorrow as the Lantus and Prandin continue to work.

Lessons:
1. Don't overshoot it late at night, it's easier to correct a low at night than a high.
2. If you aren't very active during the day expect your ratio to be smaller than usual. Afer the run I was almost 240c:2 pills. Today 150c:2 pills is too high.
3. If you don't sleep long enough you tend to run a little less efficient which can lead to highs.

As for me, since I'm already gluten free, I'm giving up caffeine.

Day 63

First Family Visit Since Diagnosis

The title says it all. Today my sis arrived from DC, the first family member to see me since my diagnosis. I gotta say that missing the first 8 weeks was probably good in the respect that they never saw me super weak, but also bad in that none of them will ever have quite as specific of a sense of how bad it got. I'm better now, not cured, but under control.

The reunion was sweet. She cried a little, but, she's a crier. I laughed a little, but, I'm a laugher. I showed off my insulin pen, taught her how to use a glucagon pen* and in general threw all my new gadgets and knowledge and excitement about the disease in her face and hoped she would share some of my new forced passion for the subject. She will, in time, but for now in classic fashion she's tired and wants to sleep.

Dailies:

11:32 -> 106 Hooray! Took 2 Prandin with cereal 110c. At noon I had a banana 25c. At 1:00 I had an apple 20c. I rode 18.5 miles with Seth. At 2:30 I had toast 25c, carrots 14c and cucumbers 2c = 41c.
6:15 -> 74 Not a bad number considering the big morning workout and distance from my first pill. Took a Prandin. Dinner: yams with onions 45c, broccoli rabe 12c, 3/4 of a chicken, apple sauce 10c, 2 tangelos 40c = 107c. Felt a little light mid show and had a few bites of chocolate 7c. At 11:30 I took 5 units Lantus and had a gluten-free beer.
12:56 -> 71 Had a salad 25c but didn't take a pill.
2:34 -> 79 Moving in the right direction, and it will continue to move because the olive oil and avocado are slowing down the break down to glucose. But because of the workout and because I'm going to bed I'm going to play it safe - apple 20c.

Nothing quite like family.


* Here is what the Glucagon Kit looks like. It's in a sexy red medical case that I will ALWAYS keep in my diabetic bag. Inside, along with some confusing instructions are the two items you see. The syringe is filled with some sort of saline, something unoffensive to your body, think of it as water. The vial is filled with some sort of powdered broken down sugar (glucagon), think of it as the medicine. If I'm passed out or convulsing or something else frightening like that please administer an injection of Glucagon.

1. Pop off all the caps, the syringe should have just the needle showing. As for the vial pop off the plastic cap, there's probably some sort of porous covering underneath.

2. Stick the syringe into the vial and drain all the fluid so that it's in the vial. Remove the syringe.

3. Swirl (don't shake) the vial until all the powder has dissolved.

4. Draw the now mixed medicine cocktail back into the syringe.

5. Make sure there are no air bubbles in the syringe.

6. Find muscle tissue on me (I assumed this was a no brainer but then my sister pointed to the spot on my arm
between tricep and bicep right where the bone was and said "there?") preferably in the meat of the shoulder, meat of the butt or meat of the thigh.

7. Wait a few minutes for it to work.

8. If it doesn't work call 911.


Day 59