The final day of 2011 has rolled around. In Times Square the ball waits atop the spire like a perfect bead of insulin ready to drip down the New York sized syringe into the new year. The excitement of being diagnosed is starting to wear off and the normal burdens of life are creeping back. Being tired after a short night's sleep for instance, or a rushed breakfast, or not having time to prepare a meal for my shorter than usual dinner break. None of these in and of themselves bring about the end of the world, but they start to take their toll. What I'm trying to say is that today wasn't perfect. I was tired and sore for much of the day. I experienced two lows, one after dinner and one after supper, and one high after overcompensating for my first low.
#s
11:52 -> 154 At least I woke up at a good number. Took 5 units with cereal, then had a pb and j to preemptively fight my post meal low.
1:53 -> 114 Good thing I had the sandwich
5:02 -> 138 5 units with dinner: chicken legs, quinoa, salad. During fight call I started feeling low and so had 2 cookies, chocolate and a sip of coke. Then an apple and a clif bar.
6:53 -> 106 The sugar had finally started rising, except I overshot it and started feeling progressively muddy, with muscle cramps, irritability and petulance ganging up on me.
8:19 -> 271 Waaay too high. Didn't know what to do except to do the show. Had some celery and some apple cider vinegar and made a point of being over-active on stage. Also chugged water to try and flush some of it out.
10:11 -> 227 Coming down finally. Had some almonds in the hope that the protein would slow down any remaining sugar I was digesting, and curb my appetite.
12:22 -> 50 I got to Minasian's New Years party assuming I was still a tad high. I took 5 units and had some ham with cheese, arugula, bread with apple butter, pita chips with hummus and a glass of wine. After the new year and some festive dancing I started feeling my heart rate rise. Excited about the New Year? No, just a dropping blood sugar level. I had 8 oz of coke, a piece of gingerbread cake and a beer. Started feeling much better.
1:19 -> 77 Looks like I didn't overshoot this time. A full hour had passed and I was obviously moving up but not too quickly. I had an apple. I will also have a Lara bar and then I'll go to bed.
And so one year ends and another begins surrounded by friends of so many years that the label "friends" doesn't do them justice. I'm going to perform their wedding ceremony, that sounds more like family to me. We didn't drink too much or party too late or dance to raucously. We wore shirts designed by the same tailor with woven ties and sat on chairs in the corner soaking it in. Twelve and a half years we had known each other, and in those twelve and a half years life had been very good to us both.
I also found a new bag I'm going to look into for my kit. Filson Rugged Twill bags. I may have to put this up to a vote. Filson v. Saddleback Leather Co. thoughts?
From a friend, advice for the new year: "Eat well, enjoy every meal and realize how lucky you are."
Day 12
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Bagel - or proof there is a God
I felt great all day today. I got less sleep than usual, but the sun was out and the weather was warm. Despite waking earlier, eating at different hours, having an extra hour of rehearsal and going to a restaurant at night I kept my numbers in a good range. OH! And I had a bagel today!! It was sooo delicious, pumpernickel with whitefish spread. And after eating it (and my usual breakfast) my numbers were still in a good range.
My new goal is to have all my numbers in the right range if/when I get blood work done when I see the endocrinologist this Tuesday.
And I got a crockpot today, a 3.5 quart, 4 setting programmable Cuisinart with very positive ratings. I can't wait to try out some recipes from my "diabetic slow cook book." Or maybe I'll just try something on my own. Maybe a small lamb roast, yes... it's been awhile since I had a good piece of lamb.
###s
pbpk: 176.6
9:45 -> 152 Took 5 units Novolog with cereal.
11:45 -> 108 Had 1/2 a pumpernickel bagel with whitefish. During the lunch break I power walked to and from Time Square. Then at 2:00 I had an egg sandwich, an apple and two cookies.
4:18 -> 170 Feel a bit foggy in the head. Had a clif bar.
6:52 -> 150 Following an hour and a half nap. Took 5 units with dinner: 3 drumsticks, brussel sprouts, 2 yams, mung beans and two small pieces of chocolate.
9:19 -> 121 Had a pack of Pez before Topthorn's entrance because I felt a tad low. Also ate an apple at intermission. After the show I had a few more Pez and a bit of chocolate because I was feeling a little low again.
11:47 -> 185 5 units with dinner: A mexican platter of chicken enchiladas in a green sauce with rice, beans and tortilla chips from "Arriba Arriba" while on a date. Too bad the date wasn't that great.
2:21 -> 79 Feel pretty good but have a slight tremble. Had a piece of peppermint bark.
3:15 -> 15 units of Lantus
So you can see it was a good day. In fact it could only have been better if the date went well. I find that the girl I was with is too negative. She doesn't listen very well, likes to talk and is still living very much in her college years. Everything she says is some fantastical story about some extreme thing that happened in college that made her the victim. Either that or stories of the horrors that happen in our world (serial killers and dolphin clubbing came up during conversation). I would try to steer the conversation to a more positive direction but was almost always interrupted. So I'll keep looking. But the night wasn't a total loss. Looking out across the Hudson at 2:00 in the morning helped soothe many of the frantic thoughts I've been juggling into a nice calm. The seagulls sleeping on the docks and on the pylons sticking up from the water. Who knew you could find so much peace between New York and New Jersey.
If days never got worse than today I could happily live with this disease into my 100s. One can only pray.
Day 11
My new goal is to have all my numbers in the right range if/when I get blood work done when I see the endocrinologist this Tuesday.
And I got a crockpot today, a 3.5 quart, 4 setting programmable Cuisinart with very positive ratings. I can't wait to try out some recipes from my "diabetic slow cook book." Or maybe I'll just try something on my own. Maybe a small lamb roast, yes... it's been awhile since I had a good piece of lamb.
###s
pbpk: 176.6
9:45 -> 152 Took 5 units Novolog with cereal.
11:45 -> 108 Had 1/2 a pumpernickel bagel with whitefish. During the lunch break I power walked to and from Time Square. Then at 2:00 I had an egg sandwich, an apple and two cookies.
4:18 -> 170 Feel a bit foggy in the head. Had a clif bar.
6:52 -> 150 Following an hour and a half nap. Took 5 units with dinner: 3 drumsticks, brussel sprouts, 2 yams, mung beans and two small pieces of chocolate.
9:19 -> 121 Had a pack of Pez before Topthorn's entrance because I felt a tad low. Also ate an apple at intermission. After the show I had a few more Pez and a bit of chocolate because I was feeling a little low again.
11:47 -> 185 5 units with dinner: A mexican platter of chicken enchiladas in a green sauce with rice, beans and tortilla chips from "Arriba Arriba" while on a date. Too bad the date wasn't that great.
2:21 -> 79 Feel pretty good but have a slight tremble. Had a piece of peppermint bark.
3:15 -> 15 units of Lantus
So you can see it was a good day. In fact it could only have been better if the date went well. I find that the girl I was with is too negative. She doesn't listen very well, likes to talk and is still living very much in her college years. Everything she says is some fantastical story about some extreme thing that happened in college that made her the victim. Either that or stories of the horrors that happen in our world (serial killers and dolphin clubbing came up during conversation). I would try to steer the conversation to a more positive direction but was almost always interrupted. So I'll keep looking. But the night wasn't a total loss. Looking out across the Hudson at 2:00 in the morning helped soothe many of the frantic thoughts I've been juggling into a nice calm. The seagulls sleeping on the docks and on the pylons sticking up from the water. Who knew you could find so much peace between New York and New Jersey.
If days never got worse than today I could happily live with this disease into my 100s. One can only pray.
Day 11
Friday, December 30, 2011
Woes at Work
I sorta juked the stats today. I stayed aware of my physical state after eating and taking insulin and tried to respond to any sensations I had before checking. It kept my range to within 126 points which is good. But the day as a whole was mixed. I'm tired, but just from a busy rehearsal schedule (I'm beginning to tell the difference). My morning numbers were pretty good but slightly high so I had a more modest version of my usual breakfast and felt fine for about an hour and a half but then started getting jittery... right when I was called on stage to rehearse. I consumed two energy bars while onstage (and while operating the horse) but my performance was a bit lackluster and later when I was given notes I was jittery, defensive, and had difficulty communicating. I probably looked really offended, when really I was just experiencing a low. When I finally checked it was 113.
Other than that the day was pretty good. I've started doing push-ups a few times a day, pull ups more than a few times a day, and learned an exercise that, with some luck, will help me to develop the ideal masculine curvature of the buttocks region. I've also drafted a letter to send to my cast to inform them of my new adventure. And I've bid on a gentleman's leather satchel to carry my necessary equipment. It's guaranteed for 100 years. Yeah, that should be long enough.
El Numeros!!
pbpk - 173.8
11:23 -> 184 Felt good but slightly high. Had a smaller breakfast than usual with 5 units.
1:27 -> 129 A little muddy but otherwise good.
3:55 -> 113 As I rehearsed I started feeling faint and then jittery. I had an apple, then a Lara bar and then a Clif bar.
5:17 -> 174 5 units with dinner: 1.5 yams, chicken w/veg (so delicious!!), salad w/whole avocado, mung beans.
7:17 -> 91 Thought I was high... had two or three cookies.
12:05 -> 188 5 units with supper: salad w/oysters, quinoa w/a packet of indian food, red cabbage.
2:02 -> 62 Dang it, my low of the day. Had a spoon of jam, some milk, 1/2 a pb&j, a half cup of ice cream and a handful of quadratinis.
2:40 ->15 units of Lantus.
Day 10
Other than that the day was pretty good. I've started doing push-ups a few times a day, pull ups more than a few times a day, and learned an exercise that, with some luck, will help me to develop the ideal masculine curvature of the buttocks region. I've also drafted a letter to send to my cast to inform them of my new adventure. And I've bid on a gentleman's leather satchel to carry my necessary equipment. It's guaranteed for 100 years. Yeah, that should be long enough.
El Numeros!!
pbpk - 173.8
11:23 -> 184 Felt good but slightly high. Had a smaller breakfast than usual with 5 units.
1:27 -> 129 A little muddy but otherwise good.
3:55 -> 113 As I rehearsed I started feeling faint and then jittery. I had an apple, then a Lara bar and then a Clif bar.
5:17 -> 174 5 units with dinner: 1.5 yams, chicken w/veg (so delicious!!), salad w/whole avocado, mung beans.
7:17 -> 91 Thought I was high... had two or three cookies.
12:05 -> 188 5 units with supper: salad w/oysters, quinoa w/a packet of indian food, red cabbage.
2:02 -> 62 Dang it, my low of the day. Had a spoon of jam, some milk, 1/2 a pb&j, a half cup of ice cream and a handful of quadratinis.
2:40 ->15 units of Lantus.
Day 10
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
My Anniversary
You know what today is? It's the one year anniversary of my arrival in NYC. A year ago today I had never stepped foot on a Broadway stage, devoured a proper slice, eaten at Golden Unicorn, lived through a tropical storm, walked the high line, weekended at the Hamptons, hiked through the Catskills, road tripped to Bar Harbor, or dated a super model. Now I've done all but one of those things.
The numbers today weren't so good...
Pbpk weight: 175 (that's 14 pounds in as many days)
11:23 -> 157 felt good, but never seem to feel rested enough.
11:40 -> 5 units NovoLog with Breakfast cereal blend and 6 oz turkey sausage
1:36 -> 273 Too high! And I didn't even feel that high.
3:21 -> 159 Felt good. Avoided eating too much after the high reading and drank some coffee and some apple cider vinegar
4:56 -> 81 I was feeling a bit light. Took 5 units NovoLog with Lentils, Salad, Avocado and Chicken with roasted vegetables.
7:12 -> 76 While shopping in a Trader Joe's at 6:11 I started getting strong "low" signals and so I ate an entire pack of pez candies. When next I checked I was at 76. I had a few bites of Seth's mom's desssert.
9:22 -> 147 Feel good at Intermission.
12:45 -> 111 Feel good but hungry. Took 5 units NovoLog with 8 oz steak, mung beans, salad and some chips an hummus.
2:30 -> 50 Heart was racing, and I was feeling very frantic. I need more carbs in my lunch and dinner I guess. I had a half teaspoon honey -- waited, had some ice cream, and a cookie, then had a sip of milk and a piece of bread with peanut butter and jelly.
2:57 -> 84 I'm sure I'm on the rise, and I probably over shot the mark, but I'm not checking again tonight unless I feel funny. We'll see what it is tomorrow morning. Took 15 units of Lantus.
...but I still think I learned something. Lows aren't fun. My blood sugar tends to increase while I sleep. My breakfast usually makes my sugar go up, while my lunch and dinner usually make it go down. This is probably especially true if I'm very active during the day. My worst moments are about an hour and a half after I eat. My best moments begin about two and a half hours after I eat until I next take my insulin. Is it possible that as I go through the day my metabolism gets faster and therefor breaks down sugar faster, while at night and in the early morning when my body is still cool I break down sugar slower? Must test out this hypothesis, gently and slowly.
Day 9
The numbers today weren't so good...
Pbpk weight: 175 (that's 14 pounds in as many days)
11:23 -> 157 felt good, but never seem to feel rested enough.
11:40 -> 5 units NovoLog with Breakfast cereal blend and 6 oz turkey sausage
1:36 -> 273 Too high! And I didn't even feel that high.
3:21 -> 159 Felt good. Avoided eating too much after the high reading and drank some coffee and some apple cider vinegar
4:56 -> 81 I was feeling a bit light. Took 5 units NovoLog with Lentils, Salad, Avocado and Chicken with roasted vegetables.
7:12 -> 76 While shopping in a Trader Joe's at 6:11 I started getting strong "low" signals and so I ate an entire pack of pez candies. When next I checked I was at 76. I had a few bites of Seth's mom's desssert.
9:22 -> 147 Feel good at Intermission.
12:45 -> 111 Feel good but hungry. Took 5 units NovoLog with 8 oz steak, mung beans, salad and some chips an hummus.
2:30 -> 50 Heart was racing, and I was feeling very frantic. I need more carbs in my lunch and dinner I guess. I had a half teaspoon honey -- waited, had some ice cream, and a cookie, then had a sip of milk and a piece of bread with peanut butter and jelly.
2:57 -> 84 I'm sure I'm on the rise, and I probably over shot the mark, but I'm not checking again tonight unless I feel funny. We'll see what it is tomorrow morning. Took 15 units of Lantus.
...but I still think I learned something. Lows aren't fun. My blood sugar tends to increase while I sleep. My breakfast usually makes my sugar go up, while my lunch and dinner usually make it go down. This is probably especially true if I'm very active during the day. My worst moments are about an hour and a half after I eat. My best moments begin about two and a half hours after I eat until I next take my insulin. Is it possible that as I go through the day my metabolism gets faster and therefor breaks down sugar faster, while at night and in the early morning when my body is still cool I break down sugar slower? Must test out this hypothesis, gently and slowly.
Day 9
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Lows... ugh
I designed a t-shirt today: "Diabetes is Life Threatening"
Whaddya think?
Today was another classically long day at War Horse that was for the most part uneventful. I had a slightly scary low about 15 minutes before going onstage. It was my own fault. It being holiday season and all the green room was full to bursting with confectionary delights. And me being a sweet toothed diabetic newbie I decided I would try bending the rules and eat only the protein and fiber portions of my dinner so that I could have a few sweets at the end -- except I didn't have enough sweets. All of a sudden I was shaking like a washing machine and sweating like a sauna. I took my sugar and set a new personal record (NOT a good thing). I remained as calm as i could, had a spoonful of honey and took a few deep breaths. Then I went back to the green room and had a cookie, a Baked by Melissa muffin, and two chocolate covered cherries. My sugar slowly creeped back into a healthy zone and I felt like I had just finished an aerobic love making session. But instead of being able to lie half covered by sheets and fall into a euphoric slumber I had to perform Topthorn. I hope nobody asked for a refund.
Here are the numbers:
11:29 -> 225 5 units of NovoLog with cereal, yogurt, berries, nuts, flax and 6oz of turkey sausage.
1:25 -> 228 Felt a little high despite walking from a further subway stop and beginning rehearsals. Had a clif bar.
3:41 -> 220 Felt a bit muddy, tired and mental focus wasn't in top form.
5:38 -> 115 Post rehearsal my sugars had finally leveled. 5 units of NovoLog with the most delicious roast chicken leftovers, roast veg, and an epic greek salad.
6:43 -> 43 Felt faint and jittery. Had half a teaspoon of honey, a cookie, a mini-cupcake and two chocolate covered cherries.
7:00 -> 55 Still shaky and now experiencing the out of body sensation.
7:21 -> 94 Sugars are in a healthy range but my body felt exhausted from the reflexive emergency adrenaline dump.
8:20 ->118 Finally starting to feel normal. Had some peanuts. Then later in the evening a Lara bar and more peanuts.
12:34 -> 210 Not sure why it's so high, other than some of the earlier food having kicked in.
2:38 -> 140 A good level to go to sleep on.
2:50 -> Took 15 units of Lantus.
Lessons learned: If you're going to skip your carbs in dinner make sure to eat dessert. Better yet, have half your complex carbs with dinner and half a serving of dessert. This is the opposite lesson of what I learned on Christmas day following a 6 unit injection lots of starchy vegetables, a glass of wine, and a slice of pie.
Day 8
Whaddya think?
Today was another classically long day at War Horse that was for the most part uneventful. I had a slightly scary low about 15 minutes before going onstage. It was my own fault. It being holiday season and all the green room was full to bursting with confectionary delights. And me being a sweet toothed diabetic newbie I decided I would try bending the rules and eat only the protein and fiber portions of my dinner so that I could have a few sweets at the end -- except I didn't have enough sweets. All of a sudden I was shaking like a washing machine and sweating like a sauna. I took my sugar and set a new personal record (NOT a good thing). I remained as calm as i could, had a spoonful of honey and took a few deep breaths. Then I went back to the green room and had a cookie, a Baked by Melissa muffin, and two chocolate covered cherries. My sugar slowly creeped back into a healthy zone and I felt like I had just finished an aerobic love making session. But instead of being able to lie half covered by sheets and fall into a euphoric slumber I had to perform Topthorn. I hope nobody asked for a refund.
Here are the numbers:
11:29 -> 225 5 units of NovoLog with cereal, yogurt, berries, nuts, flax and 6oz of turkey sausage.
1:25 -> 228 Felt a little high despite walking from a further subway stop and beginning rehearsals. Had a clif bar.
3:41 -> 220 Felt a bit muddy, tired and mental focus wasn't in top form.
5:38 -> 115 Post rehearsal my sugars had finally leveled. 5 units of NovoLog with the most delicious roast chicken leftovers, roast veg, and an epic greek salad.
6:43 -> 43 Felt faint and jittery. Had half a teaspoon of honey, a cookie, a mini-cupcake and two chocolate covered cherries.
7:00 -> 55 Still shaky and now experiencing the out of body sensation.
7:21 -> 94 Sugars are in a healthy range but my body felt exhausted from the reflexive emergency adrenaline dump.
8:20 ->118 Finally starting to feel normal. Had some peanuts. Then later in the evening a Lara bar and more peanuts.
12:34 -> 210 Not sure why it's so high, other than some of the earlier food having kicked in.
2:38 -> 140 A good level to go to sleep on.
2:50 -> Took 15 units of Lantus.
Lessons learned: If you're going to skip your carbs in dinner make sure to eat dessert. Better yet, have half your complex carbs with dinner and half a serving of dessert. This is the opposite lesson of what I learned on Christmas day following a 6 unit injection lots of starchy vegetables, a glass of wine, and a slice of pie.
Day 8
Monday, December 26, 2011
The ACTUAL Fittest Diabetic
In a letter to my friends from USC crew:
"I've been diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes and figured since it was the type of thing I was bound to tell each of you individually when we next talked I might as well break the news now. I have a carb counting nazi living in the place of where my once functioning pancreas was. The little bastard hates when I eat cake or drink alcohol or when I forget to eat before pulling a 10K (who am I kidding, I haven't been on my erg in months).
In some respects it's a good thing. It gives me a constant and controlled setting to feed my masochistic urges. Besides, life was getting much too easy. What, with a weekly pay check and a life of leisure in New York I was in need of a challenge, some stimulation. I thought about getting a dog -- Diabetes works just as well."
And a response:
"you are now one step closer to becoming sir Steven Redgrave (minus the five gold medals;!)"
Gotta love my friends!
For those who don't know Steven Redgrave is hailed Britain's greatest Olympian having won gold medals in five consecutive Olympics (1984-2000). In 1997 at the age of 35 he was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. Read more about his experience here:
And now, the moment you've all been waiting for................ the numbers!!
10:56 -> 151 Hungry and tired (but normal tired) from not sleeping long enough.
11:11 -> 5 units. Breakfast: 3 eggs, avocado, bacon, grapefruit, berries, decaf.
1:10 -> 67 Felt muddy and lacked focus. Had a cookie and then an apple and then walked 2 miles with Marla and Jonathan, felt gradually worse - almost an out of body sensation - and then gradually better.
2:24 -> 126 Still felt muddy, hungry and sleepy.
3:09 -> 136 Had a clif bar and some nuts but was still experiencing milder versions of hunger and sleepiness.
6:45 -> 224 Took 5 units before dinner: 6 oz filet with peppercorn sauce, greek salad with guacamole, 12 roast brussel sprouts.
8:48 -> 99 Felt as though I was a bit high, but actually was doing well.
1:27 -> 133 Eating again and taking 5 units. Roast chicken, veg, lentils - delicious.
2:59 -> 124 Feel good and full. Going to bed after 15 units.
Week 1
"I've been diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes and figured since it was the type of thing I was bound to tell each of you individually when we next talked I might as well break the news now. I have a carb counting nazi living in the place of where my once functioning pancreas was. The little bastard hates when I eat cake or drink alcohol or when I forget to eat before pulling a 10K (who am I kidding, I haven't been on my erg in months).
In some respects it's a good thing. It gives me a constant and controlled setting to feed my masochistic urges. Besides, life was getting much too easy. What, with a weekly pay check and a life of leisure in New York I was in need of a challenge, some stimulation. I thought about getting a dog -- Diabetes works just as well."
And a response:
"you are now one step closer to becoming sir Steven Redgrave (minus the five gold medals;!)"
Gotta love my friends!
For those who don't know Steven Redgrave is hailed Britain's greatest Olympian having won gold medals in five consecutive Olympics (1984-2000). In 1997 at the age of 35 he was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. Read more about his experience here:
And now, the moment you've all been waiting for................ the numbers!!
10:56 -> 151 Hungry and tired (but normal tired) from not sleeping long enough.
11:11 -> 5 units. Breakfast: 3 eggs, avocado, bacon, grapefruit, berries, decaf.
1:10 -> 67 Felt muddy and lacked focus. Had a cookie and then an apple and then walked 2 miles with Marla and Jonathan, felt gradually worse - almost an out of body sensation - and then gradually better.
2:24 -> 126 Still felt muddy, hungry and sleepy.
3:09 -> 136 Had a clif bar and some nuts but was still experiencing milder versions of hunger and sleepiness.
6:45 -> 224 Took 5 units before dinner: 6 oz filet with peppercorn sauce, greek salad with guacamole, 12 roast brussel sprouts.
8:48 -> 99 Felt as though I was a bit high, but actually was doing well.
1:27 -> 133 Eating again and taking 5 units. Roast chicken, veg, lentils - delicious.
2:59 -> 124 Feel good and full. Going to bed after 15 units.
Week 1
Sunday, December 25, 2011
First Diabetic Christmas
I spent the night at the house of Marla and Kelly Graham-McMillan, my dad's first cousin and so I wasn't near my usual scale for weigh in. I rested well, sleeping deeply and dreaming of diabetes. With any luck a few weeks from now I'll start dreaming of really delicious desserts (note to self: learn how to lucid dream a life as a pastry chef). Diet and numbers:
11:07 -> 219 when I woke up
11:45 -> 5 units of Novolog with a serving of berries, an avocodo, lentils and coffee
1:50 -> 71 I felt low as symptomized by anxiety and shakiness. Had grapes, cheese an crackers, nuts, salmon and prosciutto. Continued snacking on nuts for hunger.
5:17 -> 171 I felt good but hungry. This is usually when I eat dinner.
7:45 -> 171 still good but starving! Hunger and blood sugar apparently aren't correlative. I took 6 units here in anticipation of dinner: 6 oz filet mignon, 2.5 servings of asparagus, 1.5 servings of carrots with maple glaze, 2 servings of mashed potatoes, salad, fruit jello (real orange, cranberry and celery), glass of wine.
9:30 -> Couldn't resist a sliver each of pumpkin and lemon meringue pie. Felt hungry after dinner and continued to experience hunger as well as warmth and drowsiness.
9:55 -> 221 I could have guessed it was high.
11:44 -> 276 Felt pretty good so this number was disappointing. Took 5 more units with a tin of smoked herring, yams, raw carrots, some shrimp, a piece of cheese and some lettuce.
1:54 -> 222 This was disappointing. I was still peckish (Brit for hungry) too.
2:41 -> 150 After my too high number before I drank a bunch of water did 50 pushups and 100 squats, brushed my teeth and checked again. I was happy with this number and so gave myself my evening dose of 15 units from the Lantus. For the second time I don't think it all went in because after pulling the needle out some clear fluid came out with it. I am struggling to inject into fat tissue in my thighs. I'll get better.
I knew today would be unique. I was eating foods I don't usually eat at hours that are irregular for me. Many of the foods at dinner were starchier or more glycemic than foods I'm accustomed to, and I allowed myself to have a glass of wine and a bit of pie. The lemon meringue in particular was very sugary and likely caused my late evening spike. Also, the hunger caused by the hyperglycemia can be dangerous. I'll need to learn that if I'm hungry after a meal to restrict myself to high protein/fat foods only. Being sedentary all day also affected my numbers.
But today wasn't just about diabetes. It was also Christmas spent with family members I only rarely get to see. The day was postcard perfect: a great breakfast spread, presents by the tree, some quality time with the oldest generation, a feast for ten, a game of cards and a movie while cuddled up on the couch. The movie was "Princess Bride" starring what was almost then, but certainly would be come, an all star line up of actors. But one in particular stood out to me tonight. The mass of a man, with a chest like the hull of a boat and a head like those imagined in prehistory by the Moai of Easter Island, Andre the Giant.
Wikipedia does a pretty good job of summarizing the life and trials of this iconic man, but in the moment of watching (possibly ignited by the most cliché of lines by Peter Faulk "where is it written that life's fair?") it dawned on me that he too had no choice. He didn't choose a life of sticking out, crippling adulthood fame and an early death. He didn't choose to be so big it took on occasion over 100 beers for him to get drunk. He didn't choose to be too big to ride on the school bus as a child. But these things happen, and people deal with it. Take a look at Princess Bride and you see a man with a smile that is shockingly big even for his 7'4 500 pound body. The man was happy, often and fully. I can say this with confidence because he certainly isn't a good enough actor to fake it. If he can do it we all can.
Day 6
11:07 -> 219 when I woke up
11:45 -> 5 units of Novolog with a serving of berries, an avocodo, lentils and coffee
1:50 -> 71 I felt low as symptomized by anxiety and shakiness. Had grapes, cheese an crackers, nuts, salmon and prosciutto. Continued snacking on nuts for hunger.
5:17 -> 171 I felt good but hungry. This is usually when I eat dinner.
7:45 -> 171 still good but starving! Hunger and blood sugar apparently aren't correlative. I took 6 units here in anticipation of dinner: 6 oz filet mignon, 2.5 servings of asparagus, 1.5 servings of carrots with maple glaze, 2 servings of mashed potatoes, salad, fruit jello (real orange, cranberry and celery), glass of wine.
9:30 -> Couldn't resist a sliver each of pumpkin and lemon meringue pie. Felt hungry after dinner and continued to experience hunger as well as warmth and drowsiness.
9:55 -> 221 I could have guessed it was high.
11:44 -> 276 Felt pretty good so this number was disappointing. Took 5 more units with a tin of smoked herring, yams, raw carrots, some shrimp, a piece of cheese and some lettuce.
1:54 -> 222 This was disappointing. I was still peckish (Brit for hungry) too.
2:41 -> 150 After my too high number before I drank a bunch of water did 50 pushups and 100 squats, brushed my teeth and checked again. I was happy with this number and so gave myself my evening dose of 15 units from the Lantus. For the second time I don't think it all went in because after pulling the needle out some clear fluid came out with it. I am struggling to inject into fat tissue in my thighs. I'll get better.
I knew today would be unique. I was eating foods I don't usually eat at hours that are irregular for me. Many of the foods at dinner were starchier or more glycemic than foods I'm accustomed to, and I allowed myself to have a glass of wine and a bit of pie. The lemon meringue in particular was very sugary and likely caused my late evening spike. Also, the hunger caused by the hyperglycemia can be dangerous. I'll need to learn that if I'm hungry after a meal to restrict myself to high protein/fat foods only. Being sedentary all day also affected my numbers.
But today wasn't just about diabetes. It was also Christmas spent with family members I only rarely get to see. The day was postcard perfect: a great breakfast spread, presents by the tree, some quality time with the oldest generation, a feast for ten, a game of cards and a movie while cuddled up on the couch. The movie was "Princess Bride" starring what was almost then, but certainly would be come, an all star line up of actors. But one in particular stood out to me tonight. The mass of a man, with a chest like the hull of a boat and a head like those imagined in prehistory by the Moai of Easter Island, Andre the Giant.
Wikipedia does a pretty good job of summarizing the life and trials of this iconic man, but in the moment of watching (possibly ignited by the most cliché of lines by Peter Faulk "where is it written that life's fair?") it dawned on me that he too had no choice. He didn't choose a life of sticking out, crippling adulthood fame and an early death. He didn't choose to be so big it took on occasion over 100 beers for him to get drunk. He didn't choose to be too big to ride on the school bus as a child. But these things happen, and people deal with it. Take a look at Princess Bride and you see a man with a smile that is shockingly big even for his 7'4 500 pound body. The man was happy, often and fully. I can say this with confidence because he certainly isn't a good enough actor to fake it. If he can do it we all can.
Day 6
Saturday, December 24, 2011
Got my Glucometer
And now for a day told (mostly) through numbers:
pbpk weight: 171.4
11:15am -> 175 - felt good
11:30am -> Breakfast: yogurt, cereal, flax, nuts, fruit; turkey sausage and eggs. 5 units.
1:30pm -> 227 - felt a bit muddy,
3:21pm -> 125 - slightly shaky. Just finished act 1 as Topthorn. Ate an apple, protein shake and some nuts.
4:58pm -> 121 - still shaky. Finished act 2 as TT.
5:26pm -> Dinner (catered): Iceberg salad, eggplant parmesean, chicken marsala w/mushrooms, a bit or two of vodka penne. 5 units.
7:26pm -> 91 - definitely shaky. Had more chicken, a cookie, a balance bar, coffee and an apple.
11:30pm -> 187 - felt warm and droopy. Did the show in Greig Track then ran to catch the train. Ate more chicken and small portion of vodka penne and had my own homemade epic bulgarian salad (greek salad with bulgarian feta which uses sheep instead of cow's milk).
12:50am -> Arrived in Trenton. Felt a little faint, had an apple and a few more bites of pasta.
2:16am -> 173 - A little hungry but happy with the way I felt and with the number. I had a small serving of the lentils.
2:43am -> 15 units of slow release insulin from my Lantus Solostar.
Merry Christmas Eve everybody!
Day 5
pbpk weight: 171.4
11:15am -> 175 - felt good
11:30am -> Breakfast: yogurt, cereal, flax, nuts, fruit; turkey sausage and eggs. 5 units.
1:30pm -> 227 - felt a bit muddy,
3:21pm -> 125 - slightly shaky. Just finished act 1 as Topthorn. Ate an apple, protein shake and some nuts.
4:58pm -> 121 - still shaky. Finished act 2 as TT.
5:26pm -> Dinner (catered): Iceberg salad, eggplant parmesean, chicken marsala w/mushrooms, a bit or two of vodka penne. 5 units.
7:26pm -> 91 - definitely shaky. Had more chicken, a cookie, a balance bar, coffee and an apple.
11:30pm -> 187 - felt warm and droopy. Did the show in Greig Track then ran to catch the train. Ate more chicken and small portion of vodka penne and had my own homemade epic bulgarian salad (greek salad with bulgarian feta which uses sheep instead of cow's milk).
12:50am -> Arrived in Trenton. Felt a little faint, had an apple and a few more bites of pasta.
2:16am -> 173 - A little hungry but happy with the way I felt and with the number. I had a small serving of the lentils.
2:43am -> 15 units of slow release insulin from my Lantus Solostar.
Merry Christmas Eve everybody!
Day 5
Friday, December 23, 2011
The Luckiest Man in the World
I woke up this morning and felt rested and clear minded. May i never forget the simple happiness of that sensation. My pbpk weight: 170.
For the past year or so I've been auto-signing my emails: "The Luckiest Man in the World." Since being diagnosed with Type I Diabetes I have to say that I still find that to be true. The disease is not me. It is separate. I carry the disease like some sort of nutritionist nazi that lives in my organs. Eat something unhealthy "feel my wrath!!" Eat well, and I'm rewarded. I'm lucky because I was born with a mind that thirsted for all knowledge pertaining to health and well-being. I drink apple cider vinegar for taste, eat a balanced diet, stay active, take cold showers by choice, etc. All of those things are good for diabetes. Some people like history, some do well with science. I do well with my body and numbers. This disease is perfect for me. What a lucky guy.
When my phone finally rang I was somewhere in the middle of fight call for the first show. It being Christmas week the green room was filled to bursting with baked delights of all sorts. The Yen family had brought gluten free peanut butter cookies with chocolate drops in the middle. The Walleck clan brought chocolate truffles and peppermint bark. Ms. Kroger brought "Joey" and "Topthorn" (espresso grinds for color) gingerbread cookies along with Mexican chocolate cookies and an oatmeal cranberry bar/cookie. A mystery tin of Mrs. Field's cookies lay open and wafting. Some Christmas tree shaped sugar cookies were on another platter and tins of open toffee attracted mindless hands. I had already filled a cup with the choicest selections so that when I finally got on the fast acting insulin I'd be able to enjoy them with my lunch.
The call was from the pharmacy. My prescription had been discontinued by the manufacturer. No cookies for me. I called my doctor's office and there was no answer. I called my doctor's cell - on the fifth ring she picked up the phone. She apologized and said she'd call the pharmacy. Two hours later she texted me that the situation had been handled. The cookies remained safely hidden away.
The fast acting insulin pens were $60, making my pharmacy total for the week over $200 (doctor's visits add $75). But these pens didn't come with needles. "Excuse me? But I had two prescriptions."
"It says you already filled it."
"When?"
"Yesterday."
"I didn't."
"It says you did." My blood sugar is now raising making me irritable. My blood pressure is probably also raising. Did I mention it's holiday season in New York and nobody walks fast enough??!!! (sorry...tangent)
"Does it say I paid for it?"
"Yes." Weird.
The bottom line was that I could use the needles I already had for the other pen. But since I had left those at my apartment for nighttime use...
I gave Tom my cookies. :(
Diet: Breakfast: same cereal concoction, one egg, sausage; more chicken w/ veg, miso lentils, sweet potato with bakers chocolate and cinnamon, salad with tomatoes and guacamole; two balance bars, two protein shakes, two apples, handful of almonds and peanuts; Greek salad, spicy tomato lentil soup, brussel sprouts, tin of oysters; one cookie, a glass of milk, coffee and a bit of peppermint bark.
As I started packing for going to see relatives for Xmas my hand started shaking. So I had 4 quadratinis, and a few ounces of ice cream. Thirty minutes later I felt a little better.
Day 4
For the past year or so I've been auto-signing my emails: "The Luckiest Man in the World." Since being diagnosed with Type I Diabetes I have to say that I still find that to be true. The disease is not me. It is separate. I carry the disease like some sort of nutritionist nazi that lives in my organs. Eat something unhealthy "feel my wrath!!" Eat well, and I'm rewarded. I'm lucky because I was born with a mind that thirsted for all knowledge pertaining to health and well-being. I drink apple cider vinegar for taste, eat a balanced diet, stay active, take cold showers by choice, etc. All of those things are good for diabetes. Some people like history, some do well with science. I do well with my body and numbers. This disease is perfect for me. What a lucky guy.
When my phone finally rang I was somewhere in the middle of fight call for the first show. It being Christmas week the green room was filled to bursting with baked delights of all sorts. The Yen family had brought gluten free peanut butter cookies with chocolate drops in the middle. The Walleck clan brought chocolate truffles and peppermint bark. Ms. Kroger brought "Joey" and "Topthorn" (espresso grinds for color) gingerbread cookies along with Mexican chocolate cookies and an oatmeal cranberry bar/cookie. A mystery tin of Mrs. Field's cookies lay open and wafting. Some Christmas tree shaped sugar cookies were on another platter and tins of open toffee attracted mindless hands. I had already filled a cup with the choicest selections so that when I finally got on the fast acting insulin I'd be able to enjoy them with my lunch.
The call was from the pharmacy. My prescription had been discontinued by the manufacturer. No cookies for me. I called my doctor's office and there was no answer. I called my doctor's cell - on the fifth ring she picked up the phone. She apologized and said she'd call the pharmacy. Two hours later she texted me that the situation had been handled. The cookies remained safely hidden away.
The fast acting insulin pens were $60, making my pharmacy total for the week over $200 (doctor's visits add $75). But these pens didn't come with needles. "Excuse me? But I had two prescriptions."
"It says you already filled it."
"When?"
"Yesterday."
"I didn't."
"It says you did." My blood sugar is now raising making me irritable. My blood pressure is probably also raising. Did I mention it's holiday season in New York and nobody walks fast enough??!!! (sorry...tangent)
"Does it say I paid for it?"
"Yes." Weird.
The bottom line was that I could use the needles I already had for the other pen. But since I had left those at my apartment for nighttime use...
I gave Tom my cookies. :(
Diet: Breakfast: same cereal concoction, one egg, sausage; more chicken w/ veg, miso lentils, sweet potato with bakers chocolate and cinnamon, salad with tomatoes and guacamole; two balance bars, two protein shakes, two apples, handful of almonds and peanuts; Greek salad, spicy tomato lentil soup, brussel sprouts, tin of oysters; one cookie, a glass of milk, coffee and a bit of peppermint bark.
As I started packing for going to see relatives for Xmas my hand started shaking. So I had 4 quadratinis, and a few ounces of ice cream. Thirty minutes later I felt a little better.
Day 4
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Upping the Dosage
Woke once in the night, but otherwise I slept well for the third night in a row. My post-bathroom pre-kitchen weight (pbpk) was 168.
It was an exciting day to be a new diabetic. I had a slew of appointments made, cancelled, shifted and finally confirmed. January 3 I get to see the endocrinologist (read: $$$$$crinologist). In the meantime my doctor and the aforementioned specialist talked behind my back and decided it best to up the dosage. Tonight I'll take 15 units of slow acting insulin from the Lantus pen up from 10 the previous two nights. Tomorrow I'll start on a 5 unit fast acting insulin dose following each meal. As soon as possible they'd also like me to start taking morning and evening blood sugar levels. That's six pricks a day - I think that officially earns me bragging rights in Hell's Kitchen.
"When can I go to the gym again and start putting back on some of the muscle I lost?"
"The insulin will help you put on muscle... and fat."
"Can I get the non-fat insulin?"
"There is no such thing." - lame, but she did tell me I could start getting big again after I see the specialist.
Today was also the tipping point for my coworkers knowing of my condition. And I had more to divulge. Yes, it's Type 1. No, I shouldn't eat that caramel apple. Yes, I'm self-injecting. No, I don't think diabetes is necessarily manly. Yes, I do sort of enjoy the needle. No, you can't catch it if I sneeze on you. ... and on and on.
I tried to drink up all the extra attention from the ladies. Jess was sweet, looking softly on me whenever I passed her. Katy had a look of motherly concern in her eyes. Cat almost looked excited for me. Alyssa had a "dream" about me. "Did you?" I asked with the full depth and resonance of my voice. "Not that kind!" (and then we ran on stage for our entrance so I never did find out what kind of dream) more's the pity.
I have a very supportive cast. Everybody keeps telling me they can't think of a better person to have diabetes. It's a twisted sort of compliment. But they're a twisted group of people. That's partly why I love them.
Diet: Similar to yesterday's: yogurt, berries, nuts and cereal; eggs, turkey sausage and guacamole; clif bar, apple; greek salad; chicken with roasted mire poire in cheese sauce; lentils with porcini and truffle oil; peanuts, apple, protein shake; EPIC greek salad with added soy sausage; roasted brussel sprouts with evoo, balsamic and spices. Water always had added lemon juice or apple cider vinegar (acv).
Injected mid left thigh.
Day 3
It was an exciting day to be a new diabetic. I had a slew of appointments made, cancelled, shifted and finally confirmed. January 3 I get to see the endocrinologist (read: $$$$$crinologist). In the meantime my doctor and the aforementioned specialist talked behind my back and decided it best to up the dosage. Tonight I'll take 15 units of slow acting insulin from the Lantus pen up from 10 the previous two nights. Tomorrow I'll start on a 5 unit fast acting insulin dose following each meal. As soon as possible they'd also like me to start taking morning and evening blood sugar levels. That's six pricks a day - I think that officially earns me bragging rights in Hell's Kitchen.
"When can I go to the gym again and start putting back on some of the muscle I lost?"
"The insulin will help you put on muscle... and fat."
"Can I get the non-fat insulin?"
"There is no such thing." - lame, but she did tell me I could start getting big again after I see the specialist.
Today was also the tipping point for my coworkers knowing of my condition. And I had more to divulge. Yes, it's Type 1. No, I shouldn't eat that caramel apple. Yes, I'm self-injecting. No, I don't think diabetes is necessarily manly. Yes, I do sort of enjoy the needle. No, you can't catch it if I sneeze on you. ... and on and on.
I tried to drink up all the extra attention from the ladies. Jess was sweet, looking softly on me whenever I passed her. Katy had a look of motherly concern in her eyes. Cat almost looked excited for me. Alyssa had a "dream" about me. "Did you?" I asked with the full depth and resonance of my voice. "Not that kind!" (and then we ran on stage for our entrance so I never did find out what kind of dream) more's the pity.
I have a very supportive cast. Everybody keeps telling me they can't think of a better person to have diabetes. It's a twisted sort of compliment. But they're a twisted group of people. That's partly why I love them.
Diet: Similar to yesterday's: yogurt, berries, nuts and cereal; eggs, turkey sausage and guacamole; clif bar, apple; greek salad; chicken with roasted mire poire in cheese sauce; lentils with porcini and truffle oil; peanuts, apple, protein shake; EPIC greek salad with added soy sausage; roasted brussel sprouts with evoo, balsamic and spices. Water always had added lemon juice or apple cider vinegar (acv).
Injected mid left thigh.
Day 3
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Made it Through the Night
Have I told you what my number was? The number that I'll remember even better than where I was when the planes hit the twin towers, the number I'll remember longer than my most awkward of first kisses? I have, but let me tell you again.
569
That's my blood glucose level. If a vampire were to attack me he'd think he was drinking maple syrup from my veins. He'd be right.
It's a high number, and I freaked out. I'm not ashamed to admit that I welled up when I later reported the number to friends and family.
Morning weight was 166. I awoke only once during the night to pee, and though my mind was busier than the Ginza intersection in Japan I managed to sleep deeply. The day was spent with 5% of my mind on my daily routines and 95% on body awareness. Was that my hand shaking? Do I feel warm? Lightheaded? Am I angry at my coworker because he's a jerk or because my blood sugar is dipping? What about the cramp in my arm? The telescoping effect my eyes are experiencing? What color is my pee? What does it smell like?
All in all I felt much better throughout the day, and would be pleased if this is an indication of things to come.
I ate a monster breakfast: a bowl of yogurt with frozen fruit, nuts, flax seed and cereal; two eggs and some turkey sausage; a small salad.
At work I had lentils, chicken with roasted carrots, celery and onions in a cheese sauce, a sweet potato, an apple, a banana, several handfuls of peanuts, some almonds, mixed green salad and two protein shakes.
Dinner was another salad with bulgarian feta, tomatoes, cucs, avocado, balsamic and evoo; more leftover chicken with mire poire; a better concoction of lentils with dried porcinis, garlic and truffle oil; a pb&j; and two small quadratini cookies.
I gave myself the shot at 2:35, inch and a half to the right and below my navel. Easier this time. I did it right after 6 decent handstand pushups and about 20 regulars (with one leg in the air of course). I want to get big and strong again. I WILL get big and strong again. No... bigger and stronger! I want to be approaching 190 of very powerful very lean muscle. I want to be like a brick wall to people bumping me in the street.
Had a cup of peppermint tea today, a little skim milk, no sweetener. The tab read:
"If there is life, there is hope"
Day 2
569
That's my blood glucose level. If a vampire were to attack me he'd think he was drinking maple syrup from my veins. He'd be right.
It's a high number, and I freaked out. I'm not ashamed to admit that I welled up when I later reported the number to friends and family.
Morning weight was 166. I awoke only once during the night to pee, and though my mind was busier than the Ginza intersection in Japan I managed to sleep deeply. The day was spent with 5% of my mind on my daily routines and 95% on body awareness. Was that my hand shaking? Do I feel warm? Lightheaded? Am I angry at my coworker because he's a jerk or because my blood sugar is dipping? What about the cramp in my arm? The telescoping effect my eyes are experiencing? What color is my pee? What does it smell like?
All in all I felt much better throughout the day, and would be pleased if this is an indication of things to come.
I ate a monster breakfast: a bowl of yogurt with frozen fruit, nuts, flax seed and cereal; two eggs and some turkey sausage; a small salad.
At work I had lentils, chicken with roasted carrots, celery and onions in a cheese sauce, a sweet potato, an apple, a banana, several handfuls of peanuts, some almonds, mixed green salad and two protein shakes.
Dinner was another salad with bulgarian feta, tomatoes, cucs, avocado, balsamic and evoo; more leftover chicken with mire poire; a better concoction of lentils with dried porcinis, garlic and truffle oil; a pb&j; and two small quadratini cookies.
I gave myself the shot at 2:35, inch and a half to the right and below my navel. Easier this time. I did it right after 6 decent handstand pushups and about 20 regulars (with one leg in the air of course). I want to get big and strong again. I WILL get big and strong again. No... bigger and stronger! I want to be approaching 190 of very powerful very lean muscle. I want to be like a brick wall to people bumping me in the street.
Had a cup of peppermint tea today, a little skim milk, no sweetener. The tab read:
"If there is life, there is hope"
Day 2
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
The Diagnosis
I was diagnosed with diabetes today.
My blood sugar was 569.
I had shrunk down to a measly 161 pounds weighed naked in the morning, post-bathroom pre-kitchen. For a few weeks I had stopped being able to sleep because of a constant urge to pee and a relentless dry-mouth and accompanying thirst. I had bought a humidifier, started taking potassium and magnesium supplements for the muscle cramps that plagued my evening hours. I was eating chia seeds for sustained energy and drinking coffee for immediate energy. To try to put the weight I was losing back on I added bread heavily buttered and jammed to every meal, changed my normal water consumption to juice and whole milk. I ate constantly, loading up on my favorite foods (grapefruits, apples, tangerines, blueberries... I like fruit) and having at least one heaping bowl of ice cream per day. But the hot flashes were still there, my sweat had turned from a once mild and sweet manly odor to something foul.
And I was tired.
All the time I was tired.
Perhaps you'd think with these symptoms I would have seen a doctor sooner. But I'm a stubborn SOB who has been the fittest guy in the group since my junior year of high school 10 years ago.
Enough history for now. You'll get more later.
Tonight I post because after a meal of a salad (mixed greens, feta, avocado, tomatoes, evoo, balsamic, spices), lentils (yellow and black lentils, mustard, evoo, spices), an apple, and some roast chicken (chicken stuffed with boursin and dressed with butter, lemon, salt and pepper) and a liter of carbonated water...
...I gave myself my first injection. I f'ing hope I did it right. I know I measured the dose properly, and sticking it in was nothing (although, not to brag, it was hard to find any fat to put it into), but there was a bit of leaking from where the puncture was, I hope I didn't somehow botch the dose by getting only half of it in my stomach and the other half of it on my stomach. Oh, and I forgot to clean the surface of the injection.
Like a total amateur - you vet diabetics can laugh now - I dipped a cotton swab in peroxide and administered it to the puncture afterward. I hope none of THAT leaked in.
So first injection, about 1.5 inches left of my belly button at about 2:45am.
On a serious note I am scared. I heard myself say that to a few people and know it's true. Sure:
"I'll be fine"
"If anybody can deal with it you can"
"Better to know then not to know"
"We'll move past it"
Those are all true, but I'm the one going to sleep tonight hoping desperately to wake up again. Life just got a bit more interesting.
Day 1:
My blood sugar was 569.
I had shrunk down to a measly 161 pounds weighed naked in the morning, post-bathroom pre-kitchen. For a few weeks I had stopped being able to sleep because of a constant urge to pee and a relentless dry-mouth and accompanying thirst. I had bought a humidifier, started taking potassium and magnesium supplements for the muscle cramps that plagued my evening hours. I was eating chia seeds for sustained energy and drinking coffee for immediate energy. To try to put the weight I was losing back on I added bread heavily buttered and jammed to every meal, changed my normal water consumption to juice and whole milk. I ate constantly, loading up on my favorite foods (grapefruits, apples, tangerines, blueberries... I like fruit) and having at least one heaping bowl of ice cream per day. But the hot flashes were still there, my sweat had turned from a once mild and sweet manly odor to something foul.
And I was tired.
All the time I was tired.
Perhaps you'd think with these symptoms I would have seen a doctor sooner. But I'm a stubborn SOB who has been the fittest guy in the group since my junior year of high school 10 years ago.
Enough history for now. You'll get more later.
Tonight I post because after a meal of a salad (mixed greens, feta, avocado, tomatoes, evoo, balsamic, spices), lentils (yellow and black lentils, mustard, evoo, spices), an apple, and some roast chicken (chicken stuffed with boursin and dressed with butter, lemon, salt and pepper) and a liter of carbonated water...
...I gave myself my first injection. I f'ing hope I did it right. I know I measured the dose properly, and sticking it in was nothing (although, not to brag, it was hard to find any fat to put it into), but there was a bit of leaking from where the puncture was, I hope I didn't somehow botch the dose by getting only half of it in my stomach and the other half of it on my stomach. Oh, and I forgot to clean the surface of the injection.
Like a total amateur - you vet diabetics can laugh now - I dipped a cotton swab in peroxide and administered it to the puncture afterward. I hope none of THAT leaked in.
So first injection, about 1.5 inches left of my belly button at about 2:45am.
On a serious note I am scared. I heard myself say that to a few people and know it's true. Sure:
"I'll be fine"
"If anybody can deal with it you can"
"Better to know then not to know"
"We'll move past it"
Those are all true, but I'm the one going to sleep tonight hoping desperately to wake up again. Life just got a bit more interesting.
Day 1:
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